Ever Wonder…Why We Hold Hands?
There was a time when holding hands felt natural. Sure, its been a while, but at one point I was actually quite a hand-holding pro . And apparently I should get back in the habit: A study last year by the U.K.-based charity Abbeyfield that found 80% of those surveyed associate holding hands with romance.
Weve even projected the romantic notion of hand-holding on otters. Remember the cooing that was inspired by the pair of sea otters holding hands at the Vancouver Aquarium after an image of the slippery duo went viral? Yes, we told ourselves: Romance could even flourish in captivity.
On a non-sexual, non-mating front, the aforementioned study tells us that holding hands with someone you care about sends the message that theyre valued and cared for. And other studies have shown that for women, feeling the touch of a spouses hand significantly reduce stress and calm nerves. Its also been said to reduce the risk of depression among the elderly.
Meanwhile, political leaders have been known to be big hand holders. From the Clintons and the syrupy Reagans, to the Nixons, Gores, Bushes and Obamas, these famous political pairs have all been known to make a strong and united, hand-holding entrance. Sometimes when the political chips are down , this very act becomes a hugely defining moment.
Then, of course, theres Hollywood. A silly world where ones relationship status can be decoded and assessed based on hand-holding styles alone. Arrive on the red carpet gripping palms the wrong way, and its over.
For such a relatively small body part, the weight of our hands is massive. After all, holding a partners hand is an obvious signal that youre together.
Realistically, this all sounds like nice stuff, right?
Youd think.
But there are plenty of people who arent fans of hand-holding: Namely, an ex-boyfriend of mine. When he told me why, I was deeply hurt. His theory was that it was a way of staking ownership over someone, a physical expression of insecurity simply used to send a message to any love-seeking competition you happen to cross. In other words, there was no romance involved. Nil. Zip. Nada.
This was a crushing thing to hear from someone I loved and wanted to hold hands with. Alas, his sentiments quashed any attempt on my part to ever reach for his hand, even when I was having a rough day.
Sad, right?
I think so.
But I believe this hand-holding thing is something worth fighting for, and psychologists agree. An article in The Telegraph references a University of California study that found that when women are touched by or even just see their partner, it has anesthetizing effect that reduces pain.
No wonder The Beatles tune I Want to Hold Your Hand has remained such a timeless hit. That moppy-haired foursome definitely knew a good thing when they saw it. And, fortunately, I am pretty sure I do too.
Photos: Obamadiary.com and Wikipedia
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